Give Us This Day Our Daily Jest (March 30, 2009) The British Army will send 2,000 additional troops to Afghanistan. Support equipment will include 1,000,000 rounds of ammunition and five toothbrushes.
President Obama is pledging to help the flooded Midwest recover. Though he didn’t explain how his hosting “Saturday Night Live” and guest-voicing on “The Simpsons” would help.
A new study shows participants in triathlons have double the risk of sudden death, especially during the swimming part…and when their wives find out they’ll have to baby-sit all Saturday afternoon.
This week marks the 30th anniversary of the Three Mile Island nuclear accident. Speeches to mark the event were met by the thunderous clapping of flippers by those in attendance.
Iran’s supreme leader says President Obama’s talk of a dialogue between the two countries is just a slogan that offers no real change. It’s nice to see Senator McCain’s speechwriters have found work since the election.
Egypt is demanding the U.S. return a 3,000-year-old coffin that was smuggled out of their country more than a century ago. A frantic Joan Rivers said, “But where will I sleep?”
“American Idol” has confirmed that pre-recorded tracks are used for group numbers on the show…and to make Paula sound somewhat coherent.
Great Moments in Jest History (From the Jesting Archives): August 6, 2005 Disney and Sprint have teamed up to offer cell phone service to children. Disney came up with the idea because so many children need to call 911 after getting off the rides.
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