Give Us This Day Our Daily Jest: December 30, 2008
A 6-year-old Texas girl sitting alone in a private airplane was injured when it rolled down the runway and crashed into a tree. She is expected to recover…and get a job with Continental.
Senator John Kerry wants to hold hearings on how to get rid of Somali pirates…and if the solution works, maybe a few swift boat sailors as well.
Russian professor Igor Panarin is predicting the U.S. will fall in 2010. He can’t wait to present his findings to the Soviet chairman. Oh, wait…
Japan is considering sending military ships to fight Somali pirates…as soon as the pirates dock at Pearl Harbor.
Lebanese troops found seven rockets on timers set to fire into Israel…then continued on to the coffee shop.
A gardener detained with members of an alleged drug ring by Mexican police says the authorities threatened to feed him to lions. Those who have read the report were surprised…to learn there was still a gardener left in Mexico.
Israel targeted symbols of Hamas’ power on the third day of air strikes. These included a holy shrine, a known meeting place, and the Gaza City Home Depot.
Great Moments in Jest History (From The Jesting Archives): June 28, 2005
Scientists at Purdue University are working on a new type of hog feed that will keep hog farms from smelling bad. If it works there, they’ll try it on Michael Moore.