Give Us This Day Our Daily Jest: December 13, 2008
REDACTED.
The head of the United Auto Workers says Senate Republicans are responsible for the failure of the auto industry bailout bill. Ironic, since the UAW is responsible for the failure of the auto industry.
The Defense Department interrogator who discovered Saddam Hussein’s hideout says he had to interrogate over 300 people to get the location. Which explains why the Green Zone’s electric bill was so high that month.
Barack Obama told the nation’s governors he wants their help in designing an economic recovery plan…and Rod Blagojevich’s help at his next garage sale.
Joe “The Plumber” Wurzelbacher says he was “appalled” by some of the things he saw on the campaign trail. Like how some people keep trying to find ways to thrust themselves into the spotlight long after their 15 minutes of fame is up. Oh, wait…
An Alabama man checking his mail discovered a bag containing REDACTED.
Tila Tequila says she wants to adopt a baby boy. When asked why, she said, REDACTED.
A Fox News poll shows most Americans give Barack Obama high marks for how he’s handled his transition…and Rod Blagojevich gets high marks for his competitive prices.
Governor Rod Blagojevich’s Chief of Staff has resigned. So if you’re in the market for a new desk, you know who to call.
A former NASDAQ chairman has been arrested for running a Ponzi scheme. Henry Winkler was quick to deny any involvement.
The latest fugitive added to the FBI’s “Most Wanted” list is believed to be living in Montana…praying to be captured.
The chairman of the FCC has proposed a nationwide system of free, high-speed internet, but without pornography. Which is a lot like offering everyone a free HDTV but saying you can only watch NBC.
Great Moments in Jest History (From The Jesting Archives): June 22, 2005
A 22-year-old Jamaican man has set a new world’s record for the 100-meter dash. REDACTED.
On a Personal Note: Due to its much more jesting-friendly state laws, the corporate offices of JTLJokes will be moving to Texas after the first of the year.
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