On November 20th, while delivering a speech to the Federalist Society, Attorney General Michael Mukasey collapsed, lost consciousness and was rushed to the hospital.  On November 21rst, this sober news, along with the uncertainty of Mukasey’s condition, was reported on page 20 of The New York Times.

     On page 1, readers found The Story Behind The Cover Story: Angelina Jolie And Her Image, a ground-breaking look at how the actress has managed to control the press to her own advantage.  Brooks Barnes, formerly of the Wall Street Journal, will surely be considered for a Pulitzer for his in-depth research of Ms. Jolie’s handling of celebrity magazines.  Undaunted by the difficulty inherent to this task, Mr. Barnes tracked down Bonnie Fuller, former editor of Us and Star, who gave him her exclusive inside appraisal of this controversial situation:  “She’s scary smart,” Ms. Fuller stated, adding a cautionary salvo, “But smart only takes you so far.”  Owing to the sensitive nature of this story and the reluctance of celebrity magazines to comment on the people who people its pages, Mr. Barnes did not offer any other interview quotes from such sources as People or any of the two dozen other periodicals that traffic in this trade.

     Mr. Barnes was able to establish that Ms. Jolie has visited refugee centers in third world countries and has adopted several children in said countries.  His investigative journalism did not turn up Ms. Jolie’s position on the Council of Foreign Relations, her work for the UN or her recent tummy tuck and lip puffery after birthing twins.  Also missing from his research were the critical recent telephone calls between her and Jennifer Aniston, former wife of Brad Pitt, the Bra in Brangelina.  It is possible that these omissions were deliberate editorial decisions as this piece will undoubtedly command a much needed sequel.

     As of early November 21rst, Mr. Mukasey was reported to be conscious, conversant and under observation at the hospital.

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