Give Us This Day Our Daily Jest (November 3, 2008)

Barack Obama is urging Colorado supporters to vote early.  And if they registered through ACORN, often.

Barack Obama once wrote an endorsement of a book by William Ayers.  Obama praised the book because of its non-traditional look at issues…and so he could relax when starting his car.

Barack Obama says he didn’t know his aunt in South Boston was in this country illegally.  Said Obama, “How can she be here illegally?  I mean, ACORN registered her to vote.  Oh, wait…”

A headline in an Algerian newspaper declared “The Taliban Are Among Us!”  It was devastating for Algerian newspaper readers, who are also coping with the paper picking up “Doonesbury.”

Doctors say Joe Biden shows no risk for another life-threatening aneurysm.  Though he does show risk for plenty of campaign-threatening remarks.

The L.A. Times reports that allies of the Palestinians believe Barack Obama would be “receptive” to their ideas if he becomes president.  But mostly, they just hope he will introduce them to William Ayers. You know, for professional tips.
Oddsmakers say a person’s odds of being THE deciding vote in a presidential election are the same as winning the lottery…or of John McCain winning on Tuesday.

Archaeologists have discovered more than 1,000 dinosaur footprints and tail-drag marks along the Arizona-Utah border.  It’s the largest discovery of animal remains since brunch at Rosie O’Donnell’s house.

Great Moments in Jest History (from the Jesting Archives): June 8, 2005
Senator Hillary Clinton says she stays awake at night worrying about the bad decisions being made by Republicans in Washington…and about why Bill isn’t back from the 7-11 yet.

On a Personal Note: Last night went much better than expected.

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