It is likely that John McCain will be our next President if he is still breathing in November. I mean, he is OLD! But, he is white, safe, grandfatherly looking, vanilla…basically, the perfect set of assets for another boring President. Barack Obama is much more exciting, but let’s face it, he scares the heck out of most people who do not reside in Cuba. He is good-looking, vibrant, exciting, charismatic and once the curtains close behind voters in the red states, he will be the second-place finisher on election night. If…John McCain doesn’t screw up with his choice of a running mate…

The two main problems Senator McCain has right now are his battles with the Religious Right and the fact he looks like the Pillsbury Doughboy who has just been pounded out from from the cannister. He is as inspiring as cream of wheat. (which could pass for his cousin) He is a war hero and a distinguished statesman, but he needs to do something with his image. Like dye his hair or walk faster.

So, his choice of a running mate needs to add vivacity to his campaign. Mitt Romney has been mentioned. Mitt is good. He has that youthful look, is a great business leader and smiles a lot. But, Mitt scares people almost as much as Obama. Since John McCain will be the oldest President elected, Mitt stands a reasonable chance of succeeding him in the event our Commander in Chief salutes a little too heavily and keels over.

The problem is there just aren’t that many outstanding Republicans out there who fit the bill of youthfulness, excellence and the ability to pray with Pat Robertson. Since Mitt is a MORMON, that eliminates him from contention as a darling of the conservatives who say, “Amen!” a lot. Several other names have floated by but none of them inspires greatness, memorable quotes, trust or spiritual acceptability to you know who…

Let’s look at the history of fairly recent Republican Presidential tickets shall we?

Eisenhower had Nixon. Tactical choice. Nixon had Henry Cabot Lodge. Credible choice. Goldwater had William Miller. Huh? Nixon had Spiro Agnew. Law and Order choice. He added Ford. Never been in Prison choice. Ford had Bob Dole. Hatchet choice. Reagan had George Bush. Safe choice. George Bush had Dan Quayle. Uncomfortable choice. Bob Dole had Jack Kemp. Bland choice. George W had Dick Cheney. Necessary choice.

John McCain will choose…?

It will NOT be a woman. The Republicans may be leaning moderately these days but they are not stupid. Condi Rice has no credentials on her own and is too tied to the Bush mess in Iraq. Sarah Palin of Alaska is dynamic but too unknown. Elizabeth Dole, like her husband, is old in the tooth and Renee Zellweger supports Hillary. So, I will not marry her at this time.

Now, let’s check out the men…

Joe Lieberman? Great choice but he will say no. Being on a Republican ticket will weird him out. Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty? Too obscure. Besides, Minnesota is not going to help McCain balance out Arizona. Rudy Giuliani? Before the Florida primary he would have been ideal. After the Florida primary he was left hanging with all the other chads.

So, there is one left.

The guy who can help bring PERSONALITY to the ticket, woo the Religious Right, help in the South and bring warmth, humor and entertainment value to McCain’s campaign is Mike Huckabee. Plus, they are friends and understand each other.

I am putting my money on the Huck. I think he fits into the Vice-Presidency slot nicely and he will thrive in a national campaign without the pressure of having to be, “Presidential.” It is a charming ticket and a good compromise for McCain and the right wing element of the Republican party.

You read it here first. Hopefully, John McCain will read it here, too.

 

 

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